My husband and I went to work in civilian jobs and tried to get on with life, but no matter what we did, something just did not feel right. We constantly talked about all our friends and past adventures, and how all the men in our hometown needed haircuts. It did not take long to realize that, although we had taken ourselves out of the Marine Corps, the Marine Corps was not easily going to be taken out of us.

In becoming civilians again, we finally understood what it meant to be military. What we had thought of as only a job ran much deeper. It had become our life. The endless deployments and duty assignments, the nights spent apart, the well worn and unpapered walls of base housing, these were our calling.

As a young military family, we had seen these things as sacrifices to be made. But they were not sacrifices. As a civilian family, we went to work each day wondering if the jobs we were devoting so much of our time to even mattered in the grand scheme of things. In the Marine Corps, we knew we were a part of something that mattered not only to us, but also to the entire world. Instead of a sacrifice, it was an honor to know we set the standard for others by living the core values set forth by our republic long ago in its infancy: honesty, courage, respect, loyalty, dependability and a sense of devotion to God, community and family. As members of the military family, we made a difference; the lives touched by our own, immeasurable. Civilian life just could not compare to that. With a new understanding and sense of humility for our place in life, my husband and I finally knew for certain where we belonged. Shortly thereafter, he reenlisted and we found our way home to the Corps, back to deployments and duty and the utmost sense of pride we had ever found.

Though our time as civilians was short, the lessons it taught were unforgettable. We do not live the military life; it lives in us. It grows in the heart day by day as we share our lives together as military families. It happens as we shop at the commissaries and exchanges, and iron uniforms, sew patches and shine boots. It is a shared sense of pride that bonds us together as family, a family where each and every service member is one of our own, and all of us matter.

As for me, I took the long way around, but I can now say without a doubt, I am a Marine Corps wife, and I am proud. Now would someone please tell my neighbors to turn down their television set?

Barbara Eastom Bates is the author of the upcoming release, "Basic Training for Brides-to-Be," and the editor-in-chief of Operation Military Spouse, http://www.operationmilitary.spouse.com. Email: bbates74@comcast.net