Your highest duty is to your children. They have done nothing to deserve living in this kind of home. Your next duty is to yourself. You can't live a normal life with this man. There is one more duty. That is the duty your husband owes to himself not to waste his chance at life. But that is a duty only he can fulfill.

Proceed with your decision to leave, and take steps to ensure your safety and that of your children.

Wayne

Sexual Histories

I've been dating a lady for about a week. We really click. A few days ago we were talking about personal problems, and she told me she had herpes.

I am in my 30s and have never met anyone with herpes. I was married for two years, but before I was married I was a virgin and very na?ve about sexual things. I don't know if I should avoid sexual contact with her or just walk away.

Manny

Manny, you have a serious decision to make. Unless and until you see this lady as a life partner, avoid sexual contact. Otherwise, if things don't work out, her situation could become your own.

We suggest sitting down with a physician or other health professional to discuss exactly what this can mean for your future. There is no reason to be embarrassed. Simply explain to them what you explained to us.

The reason to go to a medical source first is you will not only get an authoritative answer, but you will have laid the groundwork for future treatment if you decide to proceed.

Tamara

About The Author

Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com.

Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.